Saturday, March 10, 2012

5 Things

In honor of this random day on the tenth of the third month in the two-thousand and twelfth year, I have decided to write down lists of five things in five categories that involve the near future. So, without further ado, random things that have some importance to me and my future:


5 Personal Goals for the Near Future

  • Get Healthy and Fit (this means not losing weight but gaining muscle, getting into shape, etc)
  • Learn Languages (increase fluency in Albanian and get a basic grasp on Serbian-Croatian-Bosnian)
  • Have a Baby (well, first make one, then bake one, then have one. Then raise it, too.)
  • Write (blogging, journaling, getting more articles published, maybe writing a book...)
  • Take Photographs (a lot of them. Thousands, millions. Practice makes perfect.)

5 Educational Goals for the Near Future
  • Become Certified as Birth Doula 
  • Become Certified as a Birth Educator
  • Take Photography lessons
  • Become Certified as a Lactation Consultant
  • Become Certified as a Postpartum Doula

5 Big Things on my Wish List for the Near Future
  • iPhone (I want/need one desperately. Mostly for the tiny awesome camera and instagram. I know.)
  • Sewing Machine (any one would do, really. I don't need a fancy one. Just one that works, with instructions.)
  • MacBook Pro (this is actually for completely practical purposes. It would help incredibly with work.)
  • DSLR Camera (specifically, the Canon 50D. I'll use it for good. Please God. Pretty please?)
  • Video Camera (a really good one, also mostly for work. Like the camera above, it would do powerful things.)

5 Little Things on my Wish List for the Near Future
  • TOMS Ballet Flats (they are beautiful, and a good cause. What's not to like? Black and tan ones, please.)
  • OPI Nail Polishes (such a frivolous thing, but I swear - when my nails are pretty, I feel better about life.)
  • Wardrobe Refresher (my poor closet is really threadbare. A few pairs of skinny jeans, some basic tees.)
  • Camera Lenses (I don't know if this really counts as little, but lenses for the above camera. Mhmm.)
  • Makeup Brushes (not top of the line, just not dollar store versions. I've been wanting a set for years.)

5 Things I Want to do for Others in the Near Future
  • Send a little "just because" care package to a friend
  • Serve my husband breakfast in bed
  • Throw someone a really awesome birthday party
  • Write a long letter to someone letting them know why they are special to me
  • Make somebody an awesome meal and don't let them help clean up afterwards

Friday, March 9, 2012

Natasha


I have two soul-mates. Two kindred spirits. Two best friends. One is my husband (phew. Good thing he’s one of them right? He reads this blog. How awkward would THAT be?). The other one is named Natasha. 
We haven’t known each other our entire lives, just the last few years. But in that time our hearts and souls have become wrapped around and meshed into each other and nothing can separate that bond, not even the thousands of miles of ocean that lay between us now.



This friendship of souls and spirits didn’t start in some amazing experience of love at first sight. No, this particular relationship started on Myspace. Remember Myspace? That thing all the teenagers were on before facebook? Yeah, that.

She sent me a message. I wish I had it, but it was something along the lines of “Hi. You don’t know me, but I’ve read about you in a magazine. Would you like to be friends?” Or something profound like that.
And so it began. First a few myspace messages, then instant messaging. She was in California, I was in Albania. Before we knew it we were pouring out our hearts to each other over the internet, without ever meeting or even speaking on the phone. Kind of like online dating.

After many months of these exchanges, we realized we had a chance to meet. There was a huge international conference coming up, and she was going to be there. Somehow things fell into place for me to attend, and I got on a plane. Well, four planes, actually.

So here I am, at this huge conference with thousands of people, looking for someone I’d never met. And then I saw her walking by. Our eyes met, and there was this long awkward moment of “Is that you? Hi. I’m me.” Then instant friendship. Two days into the conference we were walking around with our hair braided together like some sort of oddly attached multi-racial Siamese twins. Yes, we were actually adults at the time.
Less than a year later, I picked her and her suitcases up at Tirana International Airport. She had taken a job in Albania, and we were getting an apartment together.


That little apartment on the ninth floor of a building with a broken elevator was our little heaven. Peeling paint, bright blue tiled bathroom, no heat… we didn’t care. We loved that place. We spent many nights curled up on our living room floor talking about life, love, and whatever random things entered our minds. We concocted recipes, created indoor clotheslines covered with colorful underwear, and hauled a Christmas tree up the side of our building with a rope because we didn’t feel like carrying it up nine flights of stairs.





We went through a pint of milk a day mixed with nesquick and topped with whipped cream and pink and yellow square marshmallows. I made messes and Tash cleaned them up. At least, that’s how it usually went.


We took online belly dancing lessons and danced in our bras at night using the sliding glass door as a mirror, until we realized that there were people in other apartment buildings gathering for the nightly show. We groaned together at the sight of a little old man sunbathing and feeding pigeons on his building’s roof in a Speedo. We wandered around the city taking photos of each other. I won’t mention the time she got slightly drunk after mistakenly buying and eating an entire package of champagne filled pastries. Oops. Oh well.



When I got engaged, she was the first person I called. Well, tried to call. Her college’s stupid phone system had me attempting to get the girl’s dorm on the line for over an hour. When I was wedding dress shopping, she got on a plane and came to Florida. We stayed up all night talking and stayed out all day shopping, with occasional breaks for coffee or laser tag.



When she came through FL on a school trip, I drove three hours to her concert, kidnapped her, and took her home. We spent the entire night talking and then realized that she had to be at her next concert in an hour, so off she went, back on tour, without a wink of sleep. I did bring her a frappe though, hidden in a thermos so her anti-coffee  friends would think it was a smoothie.



When she didn’t show up at the airport before my wedding rehearsal dinner, I freaked out and started calling airlines while inhaling the candy from my centerpieces. When I found out that she had been rerouted because of weather and would arrive shortly, I left my rehearsal dinner (before you start marveling over what a good friend I am, I should mention that my rehearsal dinner was rained out by that same weather, so I wasn’t exactly leaving a rocking party), jumped in the car with my fiancĂ© and my other awesome friend, and took off for the airport at eighty miles an hour. It wasn’t until we actually arrived at the airport that I realized that I had forgotten my shoes. I called my mom to have her grab them from the rehearsal dinner parking lot, and skipped through the airport barefoot to find my friend.

The night before my wedding when I was caught up in chopping vegetables and tying tiny bows, she took the projects out of my hands and told me to take a bath and go to bed. When I woke up the next morning, she was laying halfway on the bed, halfway on the floor, and every project was done.

While I sat in a massage chair getting a pedicure, she ran last minute errands and bought me coffee.  She sat in the backseat with me on the way home, holding my coffee cup up to my lips every time I wanted a sip so I wouldn’t risk messing up my newly painted fingernails.

While I carried boxes and suitcases to our wedding suite, she sweet-talked a hotel clerk into opening the closed hotel coffee shop and making me a caramel frappe for free. Do you notice a theme of coffee in our relationship?

She finally stopped helping and asked me for help when it came time to do her makeup for the wedding. Makeup never was her thing. Probably because she doesn’t need it. Did I mention she is the most beautiful person I know? She giggled as I searched my eye shadow palette for a shade that would work on her and teased my fiancĂ© across the room as he sat sewing the final touches onto my crinoline.

In the bride’s preparation room she curled my hair and powdered my shoulders as I hyperventilated, and knelt in front of me to remove the friendship anklet from her ankle and attach it to mine. My “something borrowed”.



She was my rock and my calm as I got ready to walk down the aisle, and then blew all my strength away as she played “Meditation” on her violin and brought tears to my eyes. How many times had I heard her practice that song when we lived together? It was already surrounded by so many memories, and now wrapped up in even deeper ones.



She spent our wedding reception not eating, but taking photos of every tiny detail I had worked so long to create. I nearly cried when I saw the thousands of images she had captured of each special detail and moment. She led Albanian line dances with laughter and energy while I attempted to keep up in a ball gown and bare feet.



We hugged and shed a few tears when it was time for her to go back home. We knew it would be a long time before we saw each other again. It’s been almost a year since that day, and we are eagerly awaiting a reunion. But until then, we’ll email, skype, facebook, whatever. It doesn’t really matter. Even if we had no way of communicating for the entire year, I don’t think it would lesson our connection. We are soul sisters, and no matter where we are or where our lives takes us, we will always be the best of friends.








Thursday, March 1, 2012

365 Questions to Answer in 2012 (March)

1. How could today have been better?
2. Salty or sweet?
3. Did you sleep alone last night?
4. What would you like to ask your mother
5. What's your favorite word (right now)?
6. Who's your nemesis?
7. It's not a good idea to experiment with _______________.
8. What's the last song you listened to?
9. A person you wanted to ignore today ________________.
10. What was the last movie you rented?
11. What was something you wanted today; but couldn't have?
12. Where do you live?
13. If you could add one hour to your day, what would you do with it?
14. What is true?
15. What do you not want to talk about?
16. What do you want to buy?
17.What new activity have you tried?
18. In three words, describe your spirituality.
19. Describe your work ethic.
20. What was the last book you read?
21. The first thing you ate today was ________________.
22. Jot down a news story from today.
23. Are you country or rock 'n' roll (or hip-hop, emo, folk, punk...?)
24. What did you daydream about today?
25. _______________ made you laugh.
26. Who do you aspire to be like?
27. When was the last time you felt like you were on top o the world?
28. What do you want to remember about today?
29. Write down a few lines from a song or poem that you identify with today.
30. pick a color for today.
31. What inventions can you not live without?

Photo a Day Challenge - March

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Ravioli Soup


I invented this recipe a few months ago, and it's become a favorite. It's a healthy and hearty soup for chilly spring days, and can be easily adapted to fit difference tastes and the ingredients you have on hand.

   1 Onion, finely chopped
   2 T. Olive Oil
Saute onion in large soup pot until clear and browning. Then add:
   3 Cubes Vegetable Stock Cubes (Bullion) 
   1 can Garbanzo Beans, drained
   1 can Kidney Beans, drained
   1 can Great White Beans, drained
   1 can Green Beans, drained
   1 can Diced Tomatoes
   1/2 c. Spinach, fresh or frozen
Cover with water, and season to taste with:
   Garlic Powder
   Basil
   Oregano
   Thyme
   Rosemary
   Salt
Bring to a boil, then simmer for twenty minutes. Add:
   1 package Cheese Ravioli, frozen or dried (if dried, cook first)
Simmer for an additional ten minutes, then serve topped with:
   Lemon Juice
   Parmesan Cheese

Monday, February 27, 2012

How to Prepare your Body for Pregnancy


Since baby-making is (finally) in my near future, it’s time for me to start preparing my body for carrying another life for almost ten months. If you are a few months or less away from starting TTC (trying to conceive), here are some things you can do to prepare:

1.   Exercise and maintain a healthy weight – If you are drastically over or under weight, you may have trouble conceiving. This is the time to get your body into the shape that’s right for you – a healthy shape.
(Even though I wasn’t technically overweight, I lost 30 pounds this year in preparation for TTC by exercise and a healthy diet, to get my weight in the ideal range recommended for my body type by the Mayo Clinic.)
2.    Get your diet on track – Get healthy by improving your diet. Reduce or drop sugars and refined foods from your diet and start eating more raw food. Remember, if you get used to a healthy diet now, it will be much easier to stick with later.
(Even though I was already a vegetarian, I chose to do a raw food cleanse to make sure my body was in tip top shape, and then continued to add lots of raw foods to my diet instead of refined foods.)
3.Cut out bad stuff – Now is the time to quit smoking, drinking, recreational drugs, and coffee. All these things aren’t really good for you anyway, but they can be especially harmful while you are TTC and pregnant, and can even lower your chances of conceiving.
(I don’t drink, smoke, or do drugs, but I did have to give up my coffee addiction. It wasn’t easy, but I’ve finally cut my coffee habit down to the occasional - like once a week - decaf cup.)
4.  Go to the doctor – Make sure your health is in order at your doctor’s office with both a checkup with your general practitioner and a preconception checkup with your OB.
(I had full blood work and urinalysis run just to make sure everything was good and I didn’t have any deficiencies like anemia.)
5.Go to the dentist – Get a full periodontal exam, including x-rays if necessary. You won’t be able to get x-rays while pregnant, and many dental problems can become much worse during pregnancy if not taken care of. If you don’t want to live by the old wives tale “You lose a tooth for every child”, you’ll want to be on top of this appointment!
(I’ve made an appointment for a dental exam, and am having full panoramic x-rays done to check for decay or potential issues with my wisdom teeth.)
6.  Start taking prenatal vitamins – It takes time for your body to build up its stores, so start taking your prenatal vitamins now. Folic acid is incredibly important to the development of your baby in its first weeks, perhaps before you even realize you are pregnant, so it’s a good idea to start taking them before you start trying.
(I started out taking a chewable gummy prenatal vitamin, but I found out that they don’t contain iron and other minerals I need. I’ve ordered another, higher quality vitamin, and will switch out my gummies for those as soon as they arrive.)
7.   Keep track of your cycles – While you don’t necessarily need to start temping and charting right away, it’s a good idea to at least keep track of your periods so you can estimate  your ovulation dates. If you want to start charting, invest in a good basal body thermometer and use a site like Fertility Friend to keep track.
(I started an account on FF and started keeping a record, although I don’t temp. My cycles seem quite regular, so I won’t start temping unless I need to in the future.)
8.Figure out finances – Now is a good time to open a savings account for all those baby-related items you’ll be needing. Also check your insurance coverage to make sure everything is in order for prenatal coverage.
(We’ve done our research to figure out coverage for prenatal care and the birth, and we feel confident in our plans. While we certainly won’t have a lot of money to spend on baby gear, we’ve done our homework on quality budget items and we’ll manage just fine.)

If your partner wants to get in on the pre-ttc preparation, here are a few things he can do as well:
Get healthy – He should be in his best health too, so maintaining a healthy diet and exercise as well as taking a daily multivitamin and staying off alcohol, drugs, and smoking would be a very good idea.
Keep Cool -  Heat is bad for sperm, so to increase conception chances he should keep his testicles cool. That means no hot baths, boxers instead of briefs, and limit bike riding.


Friday, February 24, 2012

The Reasons Why

Something I've decided to doing my travels and moves is to write lists - lists of the things I love about every country I live in, and the things I hate.

The list of things I love is for those bad days, those dark moments where I hate the place I am and want to get away.  It's a list I can use to remember all the reasons why I should stay.

The list of things I hate is for the day I leave, that moment in the airport when I feel like my home is being ripped from me.  It's a list I can use to remember all the reasons I'm glad to be moving on.



 

Albania ... such an easy place to create those lists.  It can be a paradise or a hell hole.  It's a land of opposites and paradoxes, and it can leave you feeling torn in every direction.  So my lists will always be here, ready for me to return to anytime I need to be reminded of the reality of Albania.


Five Things I Hate About Albania
1. The weather that runs from unbelievably hot (did you know it hits 122 in Europe?!) and dry in the summer to bone chillingly cold for endless months of winter, while rain drizzles on and on and makes the entire country into a mud pit.  It's not even really THAT cold (it usually doesn't go below 8-10F), but because homes don't have heat or insulation, it feels so much colder. 
2. The power and water outages.  When it's 120 degrees outside and the water goes out for five days, it's beyond frustrating, it's torturous.  When the electricity goes out just when you're putting dinner in the oven or power cuts kill the internet right before an important skype call and then stays out for three days, it's beyond inconvenient.  It's infuriating. 
3. The cultural restraints on women are many, and for a women raised in a western culture, moving to Albania feels like abandoning freedom.  Just having the ability to jump in the car to go out shopping or having coffee outside at a sidewalk cafe is something we take for granted, and it's not culturally acceptable here. After awhile a woman can start to feel trapped and crushed in this environment. 
4. While overall the food in Albania is good, what it greatly lacks in is variety.  I can only eat the same meals so many times before I long for a taste of something different, and it's just not here.  Besides the lack of options, there are a few particular foods that are completely beyond the bounds of what any human should be forced to eat.  Sickeningly sweet orange peels boiled down in gallons of sugar water and then jarred, served on a plate with a spoon and expected to be eaten alone without bread or anything to soften the assault on the tongue, teeth, and stomach.  Don't get me started on brain soup breakfasts or sheep testicle dinners.
5. The overwhelming darkness and depression that covers the Albanian existence.  They've been through so much that it's hard to expect otherwise, but still, it almost angers me that they seem to no longer care.  I just want them to want, to try for something better.  I want them to still care.  I can't bear to see the empty, listless depression in their eyes.  There's a reason that suicide is the second highest cause of death in Albania.  Depression is their lifestyle.


Five Things I Love About Albania
1. The cafe culture, the smell of coffee in the streets as you pass the hundreds of tiny cafes on every street, spilling out onto the sidewalk as waiters pour into the street balancing trays filled with tiny cups of espresso to be delivered to local shops owners for their morning coffee.
2. The intrinsic beauty of the old ottoman architecture seen everywhere, especially in old cities like Berat and Kruja .  The whitewashed plaster and exposed dark wood beams, thousands of windows and detailed carved ceilings ... they just don't put that kind of character into homes anymore.
3. The way Albanians put their hand over their heart when they thank you for something, and seem so much more genuine about everything they say and do.
4. The over-abundance of fresh seasonal fruits and vegetables available everywhere for pennies with taste and texture that makes American supermarket produce taste like wet styrofoam, and tempts you to invent new and creative recipes for the food that you know will only be here for a season, and then gone again till next year.
5. The ever present feeling of community and the way that people always seem to have time for each other even if it means stopping their car in the middle of the street to greet a friend, holding up the traffic for ten minutes while they ask about health and family.