5 Things

In honor of this random day on the tenth of the third month in the two-thousand and twelfth year, I have decided to write down lists of five things in five categories that involve the near future. So, without further ado, random things that have some importance to me and my future:

5 Personal Goals for the Near Future

• Get Healthy and Fit (this means not losing weight but gaining muscle, getting into shape, etc)
• Learn Languages (increase fluency in Albanian and get a basic grasp on Serbian-Croatian-Bosnian)
• Have a Baby (well, first make one, then bake one, then have one. Then raise it, too.)
• Write (blogging, journaling, getting more articles published, maybe writing a book...)
• Take Photographs (a lot of them. Thousands, millions. Practice makes perfect.)

5 Educational Goals for the Near Future

• Become Certified as Birth Doula 
• Become Certified as a Birth Educator
• Take Photography lessons
• Become Certified as a Lactation Consultant
• Become Certified as a Postpartum Doula

5 Big Things on my Wish List for the Near Future

• iPhone (I want/need one desperately. Mostly for the tiny awesome camera and instagram. I know.)
• Sewing Machine (any one would do, really. I don't need a fancy one. Just one that works, with instructions.)
• MacBook Pro (this is actually for completely practical purposes. It would help incredibly with work.)
• DSLR Camera (specifically, the Canon 50D. I'll use it for good. Please God. Pretty please?)
• Video Camera (a really good one, also mostly for work. Like the camera above, it would do powerful things.)

5 Little Things on my Wish List for the Near Future

• TOMS Ballet Flats (they are beautiful, and a good cause. What's not to like? Black and tan ones, please.)
• OPI Nail Polishes (such a frivolous thing, but I swear - when my nails are pretty, I feel better about life.)
• Wardrobe Refresher (my poor closet is really threadbare. A few pairs of skinny jeans, some basic tees.)
• Camera Lenses (I don't know if this really counts as little, but lenses for the above camera. Mhmm.)
• Makeup Brushes (not top of the line, just not dollar store versions. I've been wanting a set for years.)

5 Things I Want to do for Others in the Near Future

• Send a little "just because" care package to a friend
• Serve my husband breakfast in bed
• Throw someone a really awesome birthday party
• Write a long letter to someone letting them know why they are special to me
• Make somebody an awesome meal and don't let them help clean up afterwards

Natasha

I have two soul-mates. Two kindred spirits. Two best friends. One is my husband (phew. Good thing he’s one of them right? He reads this blog. How awkward would THAT be?). The other one is named Natasha. 

We haven’t known each other our entire lives, just the last few years. But in that time our hearts and souls have become wrapped around and meshed into each other and nothing can separate that bond, not even the thousands of miles of ocean that lay between us now.

This friendship of souls and spirits didn’t start in some amazing experience of love at first sight. No, this particular relationship started on Myspace. Remember Myspace? That thing all the teenagers were on before facebook? Yeah, that.

She sent me a message. I wish I had it, but it was something along the lines of “Hi. You don’t know me, but I’ve read about you in a magazine. Would you like to be friends?” Or something profound like that.

And so it began. First a few myspace messages, then instant messaging. She was in California, I was in Albania. Before we knew it we were pouring out our hearts to each other over the internet, without ever meeting or even speaking on the phone. Kind of like online dating.

After many months of these exchanges, we realized we had a chance to meet. There was a huge international conference coming up, and she was going to be there. Somehow things fell into place for me to attend, and I got on a plane. Well, four planes, actually.

So here I am, at this huge conference with thousands of people, looking for someone I’d never met. And then I saw her walking by. Our eyes met, and there was this long awkward moment of “Is that you? Hi. I’m me.” Then instant friendship. Two days into the conference we were walking around with our hair braided together like some sort of oddly attached multi-racial Siamese twins. Yes, we were actually adults at the time.

Less than a year later, I picked her and her suitcases up at Tirana International Airport. She had taken a job in Albania, and we were getting an apartment together.

That little apartment on the ninth floor of a building with a broken elevator was our little heaven. Peeling paint, bright blue tiled bathroom, no heat… we didn’t care. We loved that place. We spent many nights curled up on our living room floor talking about life, love, and whatever random things entered our minds. We concocted recipes, created indoor clotheslines covered with colorful underwear, and hauled a Christmas tree up the side of our building with a rope because we didn’t feel like carrying it up nine flights of stairs.

We went through a pint of milk a day mixed with nesquick and topped with whipped cream and pink and yellow square marshmallows. I made messes and Tash cleaned them up. At least, that’s how it usually went.

We took online belly dancing lessons and danced in our bras at night using the sliding glass door as a mirror, until we realized that there were people in other apartment buildings gathering for the nightly show. We groaned together at the sight of a little old man sunbathing and feeding pigeons on his building’s roof in a Speedo. We wandered around the city taking photos of each other. I won’t mention the time she got slightly drunk after mistakenly buying and eating an entire package of champagne filled pastries. Oops. Oh well.

When I got engaged, she was the first person I called. Well, tried to call. Her college’s stupid phone system had me attempting to get the girl’s dorm on the line for over an hour. When I was wedding dress shopping, she got on a plane and came to Florida. We stayed up all night talking and stayed out all day shopping, with occasional breaks for coffee or laser tag.

When she came through FL on a school trip, I drove three hours to her concert, kidnapped her, and took her home. We spent the entire night talking and then realized that she had to be at her next concert in an hour, so off she went, back on tour, without a wink of sleep. I did bring her a frappe though, hidden in a thermos so her anti-coffee  friends would think it was a smoothie.

When she didn’t show up at the airport before my wedding rehearsal dinner, I freaked out and started calling airlines while inhaling the candy from my centerpieces. When I found out that she had been rerouted because of weather and would arrive shortly, I left my rehearsal dinner (before you start marveling over what a good friend I am, I should mention that my rehearsal dinner was rained out by that same weather, so I wasn’t exactly leaving a rocking party), jumped in the car with my fiancé and my other awesome friend, and took off for the airport at eighty miles an hour. It wasn’t until we actually arrived at the airport that I realized that I had forgotten my shoes. I called my mom to have her grab them from the rehearsal dinner parking lot, and skipped through the airport barefoot to find my friend.

The night before my wedding when I was caught up in chopping vegetables and tying tiny bows, she took the projects out of my hands and told me to take a bath and go to bed. When I woke up the next morning, she was laying halfway on the bed, halfway on the floor, and every project was done.

While I sat in a massage chair getting a pedicure, she ran last minute errands and bought me coffee.  She sat in the backseat with me on the way home, holding my coffee cup up to my lips every time I wanted a sip so I wouldn’t risk messing up my newly painted fingernails.

While I carried boxes and suitcases to our wedding suite, she sweet-talked a hotel clerk into opening the closed hotel coffee shop and making me a caramel frappe for free. Do you notice a theme of coffee in our relationship?

She finally stopped helping and asked me for help when it came time to do her makeup for the wedding. Makeup never was her thing. Probably because she doesn’t need it. Did I mention she is the most beautiful person I know? She giggled as I searched my eye shadow palette for a shade that would work on her and teased my fiancé across the room as he sat sewing the final touches onto my crinoline.

In the bride’s preparation room she curled my hair and powdered my shoulders as I hyperventilated, and knelt in front of me to remove the friendship anklet from her ankle and attach it to mine. My “something borrowed”.

She was my rock and my calm as I got ready to walk down the aisle, and then blew all my strength away as she played “Meditation” on her violin and brought tears to my eyes. How many times had I heard her practice that song when we lived together? It was already surrounded by so many memories, and now wrapped up in even deeper ones.

She spent our wedding reception not eating, but taking photos of every tiny detail I had worked so long to create. I nearly cried when I saw the thousands of images she had captured of each special detail and moment. She led Albanian line dances with laughter and energy while I attempted to keep up in a ball gown and bare feet.

We hugged and shed a few tears when it was time for her to go back home. We knew it would be a long time before we saw each other again. It’s been almost a year since that day, and we are eagerly awaiting a reunion. But until then, we’ll email, skype, facebook, whatever. It doesn’t really matter. Even if we had no way of communicating for the entire year, I don’t think it would lesson our connection. We are soul sisters, and no matter where we are or where our lives takes us, we will always be the best of friends.

365 Questions to Answer in 2012 (March)

1. How could today have been better?
2. Salty or sweet?
3. Did you sleep alone last night?
4. What would you like to ask your mother
5. What's your favorite word (right now)?
6. Who's your nemesis?
7. It's not a good idea to experiment with _______________.
8. What's the last song you listened to?
9. A person you wanted to ignore today ________________.
10. What was the last movie you rented?
11. What was something you wanted today; but couldn't have?
12. Where do you live?
13. If you could add one hour to your day, what would you do with it?
14. What is true?
15. What do you not want to talk about?
16. What do you want to buy?
17.What new activity have you tried?
18. In three words, describe your spirituality.
19. Describe your work ethic.
20. What was the last book you read?
21. The first thing you ate today was ________________.
22. Jot down a news story from today.
23. Are you country or rock 'n' roll (or hip-hop, emo, folk, punk...?)
24. What did you daydream about today?
25. _______________ made you laugh.
26. Who do you aspire to be like?
27. When was the last time you felt like you were on top o the world?
28. What do you want to remember about today?
29. Write down a few lines from a song or poem that you identify with today.
30. pick a color for today.
31. What inventions can you not live without?

Photo a Day Challenge - March

Ravioli Soup

I invented this recipe a few months ago, and it's become a favorite. It's a healthy and hearty soup for chilly spring days, and can be easily adapted to fit difference tastes and the ingredients you have on hand.

   1 Onion, finely chopped
   2 T. Olive Oil
Saute onion in large soup pot until clear and browning. Then add:
   3 Cubes Vegetable Stock Cubes (Bullion) 
   1 can Garbanzo Beans, drained
   1 can Kidney Beans, drained
   1 can Great White Beans, drained
   1 can Green Beans, drained
   1 can Diced Tomatoes
   1/2 c. Spinach, fresh or frozen
Cover with water, and season to taste with:
   Garlic Powder
   Basil
   Oregano
   Thyme
   Rosemary
   Salt
Bring to a boil, then simmer for twenty minutes. Add:
   1 package Cheese Ravioli, frozen or dried (if dried, cook first)
Simmer for an additional ten minutes, then serve topped with:
   Lemon Juice
   Parmesan Cheese

How to Prepare your Body for Pregnancy

Since baby-making is (finally) in my near future, it’s time for me to start preparing my body for carrying another life for almost ten months. If you are a few months or less away from starting TTC (trying to conceive), here are some things you can do to prepare:

1.   Exercise and maintain a healthy weight – If you are drastically over or under weight, you may have trouble conceiving. This is the time to get your body into the shape that’s right for you – a healthy shape.

(Even though I wasn’t technically overweight, I lost 30 pounds this year in preparation for TTC by exercise and a healthy diet, to get my weight in the ideal range recommended for my body type by the Mayo Clinic.)

2.    Get your diet on track – Get healthy by improving your diet. Reduce or drop sugars and refined foods from your diet and start eating more raw food. Remember, if you get used to a healthy diet now, it will be much easier to stick with later.

(Even though I was already a vegetarian, I chose to do a raw food cleanse to make sure my body was in tip top shape, and then continued to add lots of raw foods to my diet instead of refined foods.)

3.Cut out bad stuff – Now is the time to quit smoking, drinking, recreational drugs, and coffee. All these things aren’t really good for you anyway, but they can be especially harmful while you are TTC and pregnant, and can even lower your chances of conceiving.

(I don’t drink, smoke, or do drugs, but I did have to give up my coffee addiction. It wasn’t easy, but I’ve finally cut my coffee habit down to the occasional - like once a week - decaf cup.)

4.  Go to the doctor – Make sure your health is in order at your doctor’s office with both a checkup with your general practitioner and a preconception checkup with your OB.

(I had full blood work and urinalysis run just to make sure everything was good and I didn’t have any deficiencies like anemia.)

5.Go to the dentist – Get a full periodontal exam, including x-rays if necessary. You won’t be able to get x-rays while pregnant, and many dental problems can become much worse during pregnancy if not taken care of. If you don’t want to live by the old wives tale “You lose a tooth for every child”, you’ll want to be on top of this appointment!

(I’ve made an appointment for a dental exam, and am having full panoramic x-rays done to check for decay or potential issues with my wisdom teeth.)

6.  Start taking prenatal vitamins – It takes time for your body to build up its stores, so start taking your prenatal vitamins now. Folic acid is incredibly important to the development of your baby in its first weeks, perhaps before you even realize you are pregnant, so it’s a good idea to start taking them before you start trying.

(I started out taking a chewable gummy prenatal vitamin, but I found out that they don’t contain iron and other minerals I need. I’ve ordered another, higher quality vitamin, and will switch out my gummies for those as soon as they arrive.)

7.   Keep track of your cycles – While you don’t necessarily need to start temping and charting right away, it’s a good idea to at least keep track of your periods so you can estimate  your ovulation dates. If you want to start charting, invest in a good basal body thermometer and use a site like Fertility Friend to keep track.

(I started an account on FF and started keeping a record, although I don’t temp. My cycles seem quite regular, so I won’t start temping unless I need to in the future.)

8.Figure out finances – Now is a good time to open a savings account for all those baby-related items you’ll be needing. Also check your insurance coverage to make sure everything is in order for prenatal coverage.

(We’ve done our research to figure out coverage for prenatal care and the birth, and we feel confident in our plans. While we certainly won’t have a lot of money to spend on baby gear, we’ve done our homework on quality budget items and we’ll manage just fine.)

If your partner wants to get in on the pre-ttc preparation, here are a few things he can do as well:

Get healthy – He should be in his best health too, so maintaining a healthy diet and exercise as well as taking a daily multivitamin and staying off alcohol, drugs, and smoking would be a very good idea.

Keep Cool -  Heat is bad for sperm, so to increase conception chances he should keep his testicles cool. That means no hot baths, boxers instead of briefs, and limit bike riding.

The Reasons Why

Something I've decided to doing my travels and moves is to write lists - lists of the things I love about every country I live in, and the things I hate.

The list of things I love is for those bad days, those dark moments where I hate the place I am and want to get away.  It's a list I can use to remember all the reasons why I should stay.

The list of things I hate is for the day I leave, that moment in the airport when I feel like my home is being ripped from me.  It's a list I can use to remember all the reasons I'm glad to be moving on.

 

Albania ... such an easy place to create those lists.  It can be a paradise or a hell hole.  It's a land of opposites and paradoxes, and it can leave you feeling torn in every direction.  So my lists will always be here, ready for me to return to anytime I need to be reminded of the reality of Albania.

Five Things I Hate About Albania

1. The weather that runs from unbelievably hot (did you know it hits 122 in Europe?!) and dry in the summer to bone chillingly cold for endless months of winter, while rain drizzles on and on and makes the entire country into a mud pit.  It's not even really THAT cold (it usually doesn't go below 8-10F), but because homes don't have heat or insulation, it feels so much colder. 

2. The power and water outages.  When it's 120 degrees outside and the water goes out for five days, it's beyond frustrating, it's torturous.  When the electricity goes out just when you're putting dinner in the oven or power cuts kill the internet right before an important skype call and then stays out for three days, it's beyond inconvenient.  It's infuriating. 

3. The cultural restraints on women are many, and for a women raised in a western culture, moving to Albania feels like abandoning freedom.  Just having the ability to jump in the car to go out shopping or having coffee outside at a sidewalk cafe is something we take for granted, and it's not culturally acceptable here. After awhile a woman can start to feel trapped and crushed in this environment. 

4. While overall the food in Albania is good, what it greatly lacks in is variety.  I can only eat the same meals so many times before I long for a taste of something different, and it's just not here.  Besides the lack of options, there are a few particular foods that are completely beyond the bounds of what any human should be forced to eat.  Sickeningly sweet orange peels boiled down in gallons of sugar water and then jarred, served on a plate with a spoon and expected to be eaten alone without bread or anything to soften the assault on the tongue, teeth, and stomach.  Don't get me started on brain soup breakfasts or sheep testicle dinners.

5. The overwhelming darkness and depression that covers the Albanian existence.  They've been through so much that it's hard to expect otherwise, but still, it almost angers me that they seem to no longer care.  I just want them to want, to try for something better.  I want them to still care.  I can't bear to see the empty, listless depression in their eyes.  There's a reason that suicide is the second highest cause of death in Albania.  Depression is their lifestyle.

Five Things I Love About Albania

1. The cafe culture, the smell of coffee in the streets as you pass the hundreds of tiny cafes on every street, spilling out onto the sidewalk as waiters pour into the street balancing trays filled with tiny cups of espresso to be delivered to local shops owners for their morning coffee.

2. The intrinsic beauty of the old ottoman architecture seen everywhere, especially in old cities like Berat and Kruja .  The whitewashed plaster and exposed dark wood beams, thousands of windows and detailed carved ceilings ... they just don't put that kind of character into homes anymore.

3. The way Albanians put their hand over their heart when they thank you for something, and seem so much more genuine about everything they say and do.

4. The over-abundance of fresh seasonal fruits and vegetables available everywhere for pennies with taste and texture that makes American supermarket produce taste like wet styrofoam, and tempts you to invent new and creative recipes for the food that you know will only be here for a season, and then gone again till next year.

5. The ever present feeling of community and the way that people always seem to have time for each other even if it means stopping their car in the middle of the street to greet a friend, holding up the traffic for ten minutes while they ask about health and family.

Cinnamon Swirl Pancakes & Cream Cheese Topping

I saw a picture of cinnamon swirl pancakes on Pinterest and was inspired to create them, even though I couldn't find a recipe link. Here's what I came up with.

Pancakes
1 1/2 c. Flour
3 1/2 t. Baking Powder
1 t. Salt
2 T. White Sugar
1 1/4 c. Milk
1 Egg
3 T. Butter, melted

Swirl
2 t. Cinnamon
2 T. Sugar
5 T. Melted Butter

In a large bowl, sift together the dry ingredients. Make a well in the center and add the remaining ingredients. Mix until smooth. In a small bowl, mix together more melted butter, sugar, and cinnamon. Heat a lightly oiled frying pan over medium high heat. Pour batter, then use a spoon to add a swirl of cinnamon mixture to each pancake. Brown on both sides.

Topping
1/2 package Cream Cheese
1 c. Whipping Cream
1 T. Maple Syrup

Mix together, drizzle onto pancakes. 

Photo a Day Challenge - February 13: Blue

There may be more yellow than blue in this photo, but the bench stood out to me after the city officials gave them a coat of fresh paint for election year. 

Photo a Day Challenge - February 11: Makes You Happy

"Oh, I'm a Gummy Bear, Yes, I'm a Gummy Bear! Oh, I'm a Yummy, Chummy, Funny, Lucky Gummy Bear."

Photo a day Challenge - February 10: Self Portrait

A shockingly sunny morning lasted just long enough to capture this shot in the movie theater facade before the cold and rain came back and the heavy coat went back on. 

Photo a Day Challenge - February 9: Front Door

Not my front door, but somebody's. I love it, and someday I want big wooden doors with a stone arch over them. 

Photo a Day Challenge - February 6: Dinner

Sorry, this might have ruined your dinner. But someone will be throwing these goats on the spit for their dinner tonight. 

Photo a Day Challenge - February 4: A Stranger

Even though it looks like this lady didn't know I was taking her photo, she actually offered herself for a photo while I was photographing her spices today. She managed to look very busy in her posed shot. 

Photo a Day Challenge - February 2: Words

This street gang has their name graffitied all over the city, in English, for some odd reason. Maybe they think it sounds cooler. 

Photo a Day Challenge - February

Let's go for month two!

365 Questions to Answer in 2012 (February)

1. What is your resolution for tomorrow?
2. Who do you live with?
3. On a scale of 1-10, how sad are you? why?
4. Outside, the weather is _______________.
5. What are you obsessively listening to?
6. Are you seeking containment or excitement?
7. What are three things you have to buy?
8. Are you in love?
9. How late did you sleep?
10. If this day was an animal, which animal would it be?
11. How did you get to work today?
12. What is your biggest obstacle right now?
13. What's your favorite question to ask people?
14. Did you kiss someone today?
15. Write down the cure for a broken heart.
16. What was the last performance or concert you went to?
17. If you could change something about today, what would it be?
18. What's the most expensive thing you're wearing now?
19. Who is the craziest person in your life?
20. What word did you overuse today?
21. What is the current buzzword?
22. What was your prevailing emotion of the day?
23. What's the most embarrassing purchase on a recent credit card statement?
24. Today you've got too much ____________________.
25. What's the last dream you remember?
26. Name one item you can't throw out.
27. Are you the original or the remix? why?
28. When was the last time you were sick?
29. Leap year? What did you do with the extra day?

Photo a Day Challenge - January 27: Lunch

I offered these little ones Mama a coin for another sandwich in exchange for a picture of the cuties eating their lunch. They happily obliged. 

Photo a Day Challenge - January 26: Colour

There were so many options for pictures of "Colour" today, but the moment I saw this scarf seller on the street I knew the search was over. 

Photo a Day Challenge - January 21: Reflection

It was way too cold to be wearing short sleeves today, but I pulled my jacket off for a minute because I wanted to feel the wind! 

Question: January 20 - Are You Holding A Grudge? About What?

I’m really not holding any grudges. Unless you can hold a grudge against inanimate objects like dusty floors or inhuman entities like rainclouds. 

Photo a Day Challenge - January 19: Sweet

The lovely lady in this storefront graciously allowed me inside her sweets case to photograph her pretty cake. 

Question: January 19 - List Three Foods You Ate Today

Today I ate real food. I spent the day at my parents house. 

• Cucumbers and Tahini dip
• Ravioli Stew
• Hot Chocolate. 

My kind of yummyness.

Question: January 18 - What Was Peaceful About Today?

Peaceful… is not a word I would use to describe today. Nevertheless, there were brief moments, sprinklings and teasing tastes.

When I rolled over in bed and opened my eyes this morning, and my sleepy husband mumbled “I love you”. When we were walking down a muddy road and conversation lulled while a lamb and it’s mama walked by with jingling bells. When I laid down to go to sleep and my husband plugged in the Christmas tree to cast happy twinkling light around the bedroom.

Those were my peaceful moments today.

Question: January 17 - What Is The Oldest Thing You're Wearing?

The oldest thing I’m wearing today, and in fact probably the oldest thing I own, is my engagement ring. I’m not exactly sure how old it is, it’s an antique estate ring.

When my then fiancé asked me what my dream ring would look like, I told him an antique gold ring with filigree and a tiny diamond. He nailed it. I adore my ring.

Photo a Day Challenge - January 16: Morning

Morning in Albania means bakery delivery trucks loading piles of fresh bread into the roadside shops. 

Question: January 16 - Do You Owe Someone Money? Does Someone Owe You?

No, not that I know of. We paid off my wedding dress in August, so although we have no money at all, we also have no debt. That’s lovely.

That said, I do feel like I owe other people. Not money, just… I want to do things for them to thank them for everything they have done for me. I’ll get right on that. 

Question: January 15 - On a Scale of One to Ten, How Was Your Lunch Today?

I'll call it a 2. I had crackers, and a multi vitamin. I know, that’s not a meal. No argument there. But the cabinets are empty, and the fridge isn’t even plugged in anymore. There isn’t any point. Eventually I’ll get hungry enough that I’ll wander over to my parents house and beg a little food off them. I know, it’s pathetic. 

But we’re doing our best here. We’re struggling, yes. But we have to make it a point to think about next year, and how much better things will be then.

 A year from now, when I answer this question again, we’ll have a feast. And I’ll detail every single dish on the table as I look back and remember the day when we were so poor that we only ate crackers. And I’ll throw my head back and laugh at the pathetic day that was January 15, 2012. And then I’ll eat.

Question: January 14 - Are You A Leader Or A Follower?

Anyone who knows me at all knows that I’m a leader. I always have been. I lean towards(and sometimes fall right into) the bossy side, if I’m comfortable with the people I’m with. I’ve never much cared about what other people think of me – if I’m happy with the way I’m living my life, I don’t care if everyone else disapproves.

I’m a dreamer, a planner, and a leader. I hope that means I’ll be a world changer, a leader of positive change. Maybe I can make it happen. Maybe I can lead the world into a better place. Or at least my little corner of the world.

Question: January 13 - Where Do You Want To Travel Next?

If I could walk into an airport right this minute and hand over someone else’s credit card for a ticket to anywhere, I think I would pick Antarctica. That sounds absurd considering how much I’ve been complaining about the cold lately, but my reasoning is that it would be the hardest and most expensive place on my list of places I want to go, so why not get it crossed off?

I don’t know. I guess if I knew I’d have opportunity to go everywhere else later, I would pick someplace like Morocco. I’ve always wanted to go there, and my hungry tummy likes the thought of red curry chick peas and falafels. I’ll bet it’s warmer there too, maybe even warm enough to let my toes come out of hiding in a barefoot beachy frolic.

And yet, if I’m being realistic… I’d really like to be in Michigan right now, signing my name on the job contract we’ve been dreaming about for awhile that will allow us to make concrete plans, settle down, and start baby making. Mhmm, that’s where I’d like to be right now. 

Question: January 12 - What's Your Favorite Accessory?

Oh, my precious scarves. You could call it an obsession at this point, probably. I wear them about twelve different ways on my neck, and about twelve different ways on my head.
Sometimes I incorporate a scarf into my braided hair, sometimes I use one as a headband.

I always wear one when traveling, and I've used my scarves as an emergency belt, luggage handle, eye mask in bright airports, mini skirt, covering the lack of a bra, as a tourniquet (just kidding. Although it could happen).

Scarves are beautiful, fantastic, useful, creative, just lovely. You should get one. Or twelve.

Question: January 11 - Today You Lost...?

Today I lost... a few tears. Maybe a little more than a few, blended with a couple from my husband. We broke through something today that's been weighing on our hearts, mostly mine.
It's not all better. It won't be for awhile. But at least we have band-aids for our hearts for now, and at least now we can face it together. It's easier to face the pain with someone by your side. So those tears were not in vain.

Photo a Day Challenge - January 10 - Childhood

This little girl had her butterfly wings on sideways while frolicking in the park on an unusually warm day.

Question: January 10 - Write Down Something That Inspired You Today

A lullaby. Apparently from the movie "Dumbo". I heard it for the first time today, it turns out my husband knows it by heart. So he sang it to me.

Baby mine, don't you cry
Baby mine, dry your eyes
Rest your head close to my heart
Never to part, baby of mine.
Little one, when you play
Don't you mind what they say
Let those eyes sparkle and shine
Never a tear, baby of mine.
If they knew sweet little you
They'd end up loving you too
All those same people who scold you
What they'd give just for
The right to hold you.
From your head to your toes
You're not much, goodness knows
But you're so precious to me
Sweet as can be, baby of mine.

Question: January 9 - Was Today Typical?

Meh. Can I skip this one? I don't feel like talking about my very typical, boring, depressing day. I'm ready for a change, for something atypical.

I'm tired of getting up at eight and going to bed at ten. I'm tired of freezing my fingers off trying to frantically wash dishes in ice water before the running water goes out again. I'm tired of spending 80% of the day in bed, just because I can't think of a good reason to get out of it.

I'm ready for a change. I want to get on a plane and go somewhere new where I can start over again. Preferably a place with mexican food.

Question: January 8 - What Song is Stuck in Your Head?

Oh, I'm a Gummy Bear
Yes, I'm a Gummy Bear! 
Oh, I'm a Yummy, Chummy, Funny, Lucky Gummy Bear.
I'm a Jelly bear, Cuz I'm a Gummy bear, 
Oh I'm a movin', groovin', Jammin', Singin' Gummy Bear


Oh Yeah! 


(Gummy Gummy Gummy Gummy Gummy bear) [Pop! ]


Bing ding ba doli party
Zing bing ba doli party
Breding ba doli party party pop


Oh, I'm a Gummy Bear
Yes, I'm a Gummy Bear! 
Oh, I'm a Yummy, Chummy, Funny, Lucky Gummy Bear.
I'm a Jelly bear, Cuz I'm a Gummy bear, 
Oh I'm a movin', groovin', Jammin', Singin' Gummy Bear

Photo a Day Challenge - January 6: Makes You Smile

Big fluffy teddy bears hanging on the street for sale. Wrapped in plastic to protect them from the dust and rain, I suppose. 

Our Wedding Day

It was hot and sticky, and I just knew that my makeup was melting. My heart started beating faster as my mind rushed through a checklist of music, notes, rings, steps, and my breathing started to rush and I felt lightheaded. “Tash, do you have your notes? Do you have the ring? Are the speakers set up?” She turned around, smiled knowingly and put her hands on my shoulders. “Megan. Everything is beautiful. You are beautiful. I love you.” She turned around and walked up the aisle, leaving me standing in the foyer with my parents. Her words sunk in, as did the reality of what was about to happen. The details no longer mattered. I was about to marry the love of my life.

As the first soft notes of my song began to play – Liz on Top of the World”, my parents started to lead me forward through the foyer but I held them back. “Not yet. Almost.” The song swung to a crescendo as we crossed the threshold, the music that had always made my heart soar. And I looked up. Looked up to see the smiling grey eyes of my soon to be husband blinking back tears. I couldn’t look at him, I would cry. I turned my eyes to meet my little sister, and was shocked to see tears pouring down her face. She never cries. I felt the tears starting to spring up and I turned my head away. Tash. There she was, standing calm and collected, a soft smile on her face. No tears. Beautiful strength.

I left my parents halfway up the aisle and continued forward alone. Gathering every ounce of strength I could pull from Natasha’s eyes I turned my gaze back to my love. Our wedding had begun.

Natasha stepped forward and welcomed the small crowd gathered in the chapel, then my soon to be sisters in law took their turns speaking. Natasha lifted her violin to her chin and played a song I’d heard her practice a thousand times during the time we lived together, a song that already had so many happy memories and now is wrapped up in even more beautiful  moments.

Finally, it was time. My love took a deep breath and began.

“In the last eight years I have learned to love you for who you have been, who you are, and for the many possibilities that lie before us. Thank you for coming so far with me and for always seeing in me the person that I strive to be, even when I have stumbled along the way. Thank you for being my sanctuary, my comfort and my light when life is dark. I promise you that though the world may change and we may change with it, I will always love you, always treasure you, and will always share my life and all that I am with you.

I love you because you remind me to always be the person that I want to be. I love you because your soul and spirit are as beautiful as you are. I love you because loving you gives me the feeling that the best is still ahead.

Because I love you, I promise to stand by you through laughter and hardship. Because I love you, I can’t wait to go where God leads us together. Te dua dhe per kete arsye une betoj para perendi te mbroj, dashurpj, dhe mbaje per jet.

Wherever our path leads us, it leads us together. I am proud, from this day forward, to be called your husband.”

The Albanian words brought an extra touch of emotion to his voice. This would always be his language, the one that he used in moments where English words would not suffice. He squeezed my hand and looked into my eyes, willing me to stay steady. Now it was my turn.

“Today I join my life with yours to share with you in all that is to come, not just to grow old together, but to grow together, as we have over these last eight years. I look forward to getting to know the man you already are and the man you are becoming, and falling in love with you a little more every day. I promise that although our path may take us into darkness and into the unknown, our path will always be one.

I love you because your undying faith and trust in me keeps me striving to be the person that you see in me. I love you because your heart and soul are always ready to stand by me, support, protect, and love me. I love you because loving you makes me look forward to the rest of my life with a beautiful excitement and joy.

Because I love you, I promise to stand by you and support you in any place, in anything, at any time. Because I love you, I am ready to go out into the world and spend the rest of my life working for God together with you. Because I love you, my world is forever changed.

Wherever our path leads us, it leads us together. I am proud, from this day forward, to be called your wife.”

His little sister and “best woman” stepped forward and slipped the ring into his hand. “I give you this ring as an outward symbol of the love and devotion I have for you as I join my life to yours. It is a visible and constant token of the promise we have made today. With this ring, I make you my wife.”

I turned and met Natasha’s smiling eyes as she handed me the ring and nodded. “I give you this ring as a symbol of the love and promises I have made to you today. Because this ring has no end or beginning, it signifies the continuation of true love. It will be an outward symbol of the inner commitment we have made today. With this ring, I make you my husband.”

My little sister straightened and turned to look at me for assurance. I smile and nod. “Yes, it’s your turn.” She wiped the last tear from her eye and steadied her voice. “This is a moment of celebration. Let it also be a moment of dedication. The world does a good job of reminding us of how fragile we are. Individuals are fragile; relationships are fragile, too. Every marriage needs the love, nurture, and support of a network of friends and family.

She turned to face us. “May the love you have found grow in meaning and strength until its beauty is shown in a common devotion to all that is, and the light in your hearts be visible to everyone around you. May the flow of your love help brighten the lives of many, and may the Source of all love touch and bless you as you begin your lives together.”

It was almost over. My other best friend, the one who had looked at me with raised eyebrows when I asked him to be my “bridesman” but then agreed and happily accompanied me dress shopping. The one who was even more surprised when I asked him to officiate our wedding. The one who was always there for me and agreed to every crazy request I threw at him. It was Luis’ turn.

“Do you…?”  We did. “Then by the power vested in me by the state of Florida, and because of the vows and promises you have made to each other this day, I am now happy to declare you husband and wife. You may kiss.”

And it was done. Sealed with a kiss. Together for all eternity.

While my memories of our wedding will always remind me of my husband’s soft grey eyes gazing into my soul as he read his vows to love me forever, I will also never forget the other important people so dear to my heart that made my day beautiful. My maid of honor’s calm reassurance, my little sister’s sweet tears, and my “bridesman’s” constant spirit of supportiveness and willingness to help wherever needed.  They are also irreplaceable elements of the beautiful memories of our special day. And for that, I am forever grateful. I love you guys.

Photo a Day Challenge - January 4: Letterbox

We've only just got the mailbox in Berat, up until recently you had to take your mail into the post office to send it. But not anymore! We've got two shiny yellow boxes right in front of the post office now. 

Photo a Day Challenge - January 2: Breakfast

The byrek (spinach or cheese pie) man offered to show off his goods for the photo. A traditional Albanian breakfast.